Dealing with a Struggling Teen Denver Counselor Coach

Parents, grandparents, and teens today face daunting social and cultural challenges, in addition to personal ones, that often make it difficult to talk and connect with each other. The foundation for healthy relationships is mutual understanding based on empathy and respect. Teens can be experts at testing that foundation. They need the security of firm but loving limits more than at any other time in their development.


In addition to clear guidelines, teens also need to be heard. It’s hard to feel empathy for an in-your-face adolescent who is challenging you at every step, but it does help to try to understand their experience, even if you don’t agree or share their outlook. The themes of adolescence are the need to develop autonomy and the fear of growing up -- conflicting wishes that often make the teen years a roller coaster. Add in easy access to drugs and alcohol, peer pressure, and a sometimes chaotic environment, and we can understand why many teens and young adults struggle.


Occasionally it’s difficult to assess whether a young adult is struggling within a “normal range” or if there are more serious issues underlying, such as mental illness, which often first manifests in adolescence. If you are in doubt, or if there are symptoms of cutting, eating disorder, delusions, or suicidal threats or thinking, you should get professional help quickly.


The challenges of dealing with a struggling teen involve learning how to listen, empathize, say no when necessary, avoid getting on the teen’s emotional roller coaster, and to protect without rescuing.


Some interesting books: